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Wednesday, 27 January 2021
19. Overly independent play or makes no demands Print
There was a long period of time when my son would sit in the corner of the family room and play for hours by himself if we let him.  People praised him and told us how lucky we were to have such a "good" and "independent" baby.  He would play quietly alone without ever looking to see if I was even there.  He never noticed or cared if I left the room or came back.  "Leave him alone, he's busy," people would say.  I was even told his ability to entertain himself for so long at such a young age was a sign of intelligence.  I know better.  It was avoidance.  (a. 6mo, FC) 
People have ALWAYS commented on how well my son plays by himself and can entertain himself.  I took it as a compliment and secretly thought I trained him so well to play by himself and not constantly need me to engage him.  I always thought he had exceptional concentration for a baby/toddler.  I still believe he does, but after working on attachment, I also notice that he wants to be closer to me as he plays and checks in with me more.  (a. 4.5mo, FC)
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