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Saturday, 16 January 2021
6. Likes playpen or crib more than being held Print
The very first night he came home we tried lying down with him (paperwork said he slept on floor w/foster mom).  Tried the floor, our bed---he wouldn't settle down.  Desperate to get him to stop crying (since rocking him was making him more upset) and be comfortable his first night with us, we tried the crib.  He immediately settled down and went to sleep.  We were so proud of ourselves and him---we had a new baby that liked to sleep in the crib!  Wish we knew this was going to work against us in the future!!  He still prefers the crib (16 mos) and many times I go in in the morning and he has been up for awhile, just sitting quietly playing with his blanket.  He rarely lets me know he is awake by calling out to me. (a. 6mo, FC)

About 3 weeks after arrival when it was time for nap or bed, my son practically dove into the crib to escape being with me.  For a long time he woke up happy and would play so quietly that unless I peeked in on him, I did not even know he was awake.  At first when I would catch him awake and playing in his crib, he would smile and laugh.  But later, he began to turn his body to face away from me when I walked into his room.  I think if it were up to him, he would have stayed in his crib all day long to be by himself and happy.  He slept more than normal and was always happy as soon as I put him in the crib.  (a. 6mo, FC)
She slept so much better after we put her in the crib.  Trying to co-sleep was a nightmare.  Also, when we left her and her brothers with my mother-in-law for about 2 hours (after having her for 9 months) she asked her brother to put her in a playpen.  She wanted to be left alone in there.  My mother-in-law mentioned this to me when I picked her up.  She said she had never, in all her years of babies, seen a baby who was clearly distressed and missing mommy, prefer to be left alone in a playpen.  (a.7mo. FC)
After attempting to co-sleep for a couple days after arriving home, I gave up.  He would startle and cry in our bed.  So we tried the crib.  He cried on and off for a few days, but it wasn't long until my son seemed to enjoy getting into the crib for each nap/night.  After 18 months home, at age 2, we committed to co-sleeping in an effort to help his other attachment issues.  It then became apparent that there was a reason he enjoyed getting into the crib.  Sleeping is an intimate time...a time he preferred to avoid us.  It took us 6 weeks to learn to co-sleep.  He now will often snuggle in closer at night.  I wish we’d done it sooner as it has improved the overall quality of attachment.  (a. 5.5mo, FC)
She used to reach for the crib desperately and wanted to be in it rather than in my arms.  This lasted for many months. (a. 10mo, OR)
After my son fell asleep in his crib, I would put board books or small toys in his crib to play with after he woke up.  Around 8 months of age, my son would wake up and happily play in his crib for one hour without crying or calling for me!  It allowed me to sleep in a little and I thought he was a great baby to be able to entertain himself for so long.  (a. 4.5 mo, FC)

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